[XRCIST]

Two guys are in a supermarket when their trolleys collide.
Bob says, "I'm sorry, I was looking for my wife."
"What a coincidence, so am I, and I'm getting a little desperate," says Joe. "Well, maybe I can help you. What does your wife look like?" asks Bob.
Joe replies, "She's tall, with long hair, long legs, firm breas*s and a magnificent backside. What does your wife look like?"
"Never mind," says Bob, "let's look for yours!"

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You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You go up to her and say, "Hi, I'm great in bed, how about it?".
-- That's Direct Marketing.

You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You give your friend a tender. She goes up and says "Hi, my friend over there is great in bed, how about it?".
-- That's Advertising.

You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You somehow mop up her mobile number. You call and chat her up a while and then say "Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?"
-- That's Tele-Marketing.

You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You recognize her. You walk up to her, refresh her memory and get her to laugh and giggle and then suggest, "Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?".
-- That's Customer Relationship Management.

You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You put on your spring boots and walk around playing Mr. Busy. You put on your best smile and walk around being Mr. Congenial. You fresh all the Thesaurus links in your memory and play Mr. Polished. You stand straight, you talk soft and smooth, you open the door for the ladies, you smile like a dream, you set an aura around you playing Mr. Gentleman and then you move up to the girl and say, "Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?".
-- That's Hard Selling.

You go to a party, you see an attractive girl across the room. SHE COMES OVER and says, "Hi, I hear you're great in bed, how about it?"
-- Now THAT is the power of Branding!

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>Dammit Skippy
>
>A woman goes to her boyfriends' parents' house for dinner. This
>is to be her first time meeting the family and she is very
>nervous. They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal.
>
>The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her
>nervousness and the broccoli casserole. The gas pains are almost
>bringing tears to her eyes and she accidentally lets out a
>dainty fart. It wasn't loud, but everyone at the table heard it.
>
>Before she even had a chance to be embarrassed, her boyfriend's
>father looked over at the dog that had been snoozing at the
>woman's feet and said in a rather stern voice, "Skippy!"
>
>Relieved that the dog has been blamed she doesn't even hesitate
>when, a couple of minutes later, she begins to feel pains again.
>
>This time, . She let a much louder longer and stinkier fart rip.
>
>The father again looked and the dog and yelled "SKIPPY!!"
>
>A few minutes later the woman had to fart again. This time she
>didn't even think twice. She let rip a fart that sounded like
>ripping Velcro and smelled like a decomposing skunk.
>
>Once again, the father looked at the dog with disgust and yelled,
>
>"Dammit Skippy, get away from her before she sh*ts all over you!"