moneypit

I've got a long mental history dating back to severe bullying in primary school which lead to a mental breakdown 3 months into year 7 freshman year which left me scared as **** and screaming at my parents as I hid underneath my bed.

My father was also a **** too who always teased me and bullied me whenever I woke up of a morning. And threatened to regularly call the police on me for supposedly beating him up (I've never thrown a punch at someone in my entire life.)

When I was 12 my dad also demanded that I put a washing machine into the back of the old XF wagon, turned out to be one of those european ones that were about 150kg and I ****ed my back up from it. Dad didn't bother taking me to the hospital.

From all of this I've got a lifetime of Depression and PTSD to deal with and no job prospects. ever.

As a result of this and because of the recent Liberal government changes to the centerlink pensions. my back went out again and now I spend 15-20 hours a day in bed. But I still manage to occasionally go for a walk down the street which keeps me positive.

I also think about the end of the world all of the time. Which isn't healthy. I hope to get back into Counselling to get this sorted out.

But despite all of this,
You guys wouldn't believe what mental changes being on a Gluten Free diet can do to you.

I was super hyper aggressive and quick to anger and full of anxiety. Basically full on going mad psychotic.

Started on a Gluten FREE diet and now I can't go near the **** or else I'll end up crying my eyes out for days and accusing people of doing **** that they didn't do.

Before I started on the Gluten Free diet I was having really insane nightmares too, things to do with blood and satanic stuff. having dreams that people being really nasty to me. I think that the nightmares were so severe that they have scarred me for life. I used to wake up nearly every night nearly screaming my head off and wondering why the **** I was having these nightmares for.

Its really **** easy to get onto a gluten free diet. Just look into Sunrice prepackaged meals, those are gluten free. Also look into making stir-frys. Those are gluten free too. Any raw meats, Roast chicken, Steaks, Sausages, and veggies. ALl of that is gluten free. Oh yeah you can get pre-mix pancakes that are gluten free too. So is ice cream but make sure it doesn't contain wheat.

I'm also on Lexapro and Seroquel. 2 years ago I was using Seroquel to keep me calm and stop me from having these nightmares and from being violent (verbally). Now I don't need it for that but I just use it to make me go to sleep at night and to deal with the depression and mild anxiety that I still have.

The Lexapro helps heaps with depression too but I still occasionally think about suicide, but if you find that you cannot get an orgasm try it combined with Seroquel. I take 100-200mg of Seroquel at night and 20mg of Lexapro in the mornings.

Recently I'm going back into counselling to try and get things sorted again. I've been away from counselling for 5 years. Being stuck in this room is really crushing my spirit and I can't keep on watching Star Trek...Rick and Morty is a ray of sunshine though!

I've recently gotten back into aquarium keeping amongst a hundred other hobbies to keep me entertained. I've got a really wicked 2ft freshwater setup with ADA Amano Amazon soil and I'm breeding and selling Guppies. What I really need is a place to go once a week like a church but Christianity isn't working out for me, I'm thinking of getting into Buddhism but the local Buddhist 'church' is in town. Thats what I hope to fix this time.

I also think about the end of the world all of the time. Which isn't healthy. I hope to get back into Counselling to get this sorted out.

Good luck everyone who still have issues dealing with the crap of our modern day worlds.