Things people just shouldn't.. and i mean SHOULDN'T have said...

santoitaliano · 20-04-2005, 03:30 PM

ok people...

bullshit artists, we all know them.. post stories that are so obviously bullshit its rediculous.. ill post as i remember the 100s.. funny thing is they mostly from 1 of my mates...

1. The other day the EPA were doing dyno's in the middle of the road in williamstown..

2. I adjusted the idle on the carby on my mum's BMW (which just so happens to be fuel injected)

3. (While car was off and in neutral) *shakes knob from side to side... do u hear that rattling, that means there's something wrong in your gearbox...

4. My friend is "adjusting something" (on a new vy commodore) which gives it an extra 15kw..

5. I can get a full 2.5" exhaust + muffler brand new for $55.. (funny how it magicaly couldnt happen)

6. "I put a hole in the muffler, it sounds so much better and goes so much harder"

I will post as i remember them.. another sorta similar thing worthy of mention..

friend calls me "hey santo, someone just asked me something on the net i dont understand.. they said.. reads off the computer... "what's the g.o.?"" My reply: "they are asking you what the go is mate..."

meh..

:

b2tf · 20-04-2005, 03:37 PM

LOL @ some of those. Baaaaaaaaad!

Paris Hilton · 20-04-2005, 03:49 PM

guy named Rory at my high school: Yeah my uncle got from here (canberra) to Sydney in 2 hours...he did it at 3am in the morning a Aston Martin V8, doing 180km/h, but 170 around the corners

:

Also the good old "Yeah I always go around corners in 4th" - thinking that a) 4th means fast, and b) that fast means hardcore.

05MkIIFutura · 27-11-2006, 02:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Paris Hilton

guy named Rory at my high school: Yeah my uncle got from here (canberra) to Sydney in 2 hours...he did it at 3am in the morning a Aston Martin V8, doing 180km/h, but 170 around the corners

:

Also the good old "Yeah I always go around corners in 4th" - thinking that a) 4th means fast, and b) that fast means hardcore.

I dont see how that is so unrealistic, I can get from Dickson traffic lights (Canberra) to Campbelltown interchange (Sydney outskirts) in 2 hours in the middle of the day in my Falcon, I reckon at 3 am I could almost get all the way into Sydney in 2 hours if i was willing to speed a little, it is freeway the whole way.

27-11-2006, 04:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 05MkIIFutura

I dont see how that is so unrealistic, I can get from Dickson traffic lights (Canberra) to Campbelltown interchange (Sydney outskirts) in 2 hours in the middle of the day in my Falcon, I reckon at 3 am I could almost get all the way into Sydney in 2 hours if i was willing to speed a little, it is freeway the whole way.

I was going to say. Campbelltown to Sydney is 35mins

santoitaliano · 20-04-2005, 03:53 PM

oh **** just remembered a classic (same guy)....

My uncle has a 13 inch exhaust

lmao... lovely bullshiting, damn shame he has no idea of imperical to metric conversions..

GT-P 738 · 20-04-2005, 03:54 PM

A friend of mine has a piece of shit car and when i tell him he has to go get a "new" part he always comes back and says.

Ok i went to wreckers and got a "new one" which means it is a second hand POS that he calls new.

And then wonders why it shits itself the next day.

TheSneakiness · 20-04-2005, 04:02 PM

I had a mate in high school who thought the part of a G-String which goes in the back went in the front...

rodderz · 20-04-2005, 07:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AUII_XLS_Ute

I had a mate in high school who thought the part of a G-String which goes in the back went in the front...

lol...so he took a "cut lunch" with him to school then?

:

K_Man · 20-04-2005, 07:39 PM

b/a: yeah, was at the drags, had a few races, then i went drifting it at drifting it at 180km/h up in the sticks, it handles so damn well at that speed.
me: Uh huh, and what do you drive?
b/a: a satria

Had to walk away to recompose myself after that one.

smciner1 · 20-04-2005, 07:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by K_Man

b/a: yeah, was at the drags, had a few races, then i went drifting it at 180km/h up in the sticks, it handles so damn well at that speed.
me: Uh huh, and what do you drive?
b/a: a satria

Had to walk away to recompose myself after that one.

Reminds me of a mates brother who once told me that as he raced through the traffic he was "At One (tm)" with his Daewoo........

And as quoted above, I had to leave the room.......

SMOKDUB · 18-06-2005, 06:18 PM

Well lets see, my brother and i were watchin a car show on the idiot box and there was this fellow from NSW who had a canary yellow Torana, now he was tellin the tv crew that it was totally standard, some how the nine inch diff part just didn't sound so standard

:

:Up_to_som
Better still, when i was doin mechanic workshop at school we had a relief teacher, neway she owned a diesel 4WD, apparently it wasn't runnin too good so the boys and i told her that it was a problem wid the spark plugs, funny thing is she went to the mechanics the next day to explain her prob.

Was real funny at the time

bindi · 20-04-2005, 08:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by K_Man

b/a: yeah, was at the drags, had a few races, then i went drifting it at 180km/h up in the sticks, it handles so damn well at that speed.
me: Uh huh, and what do you drive?
b/a: a satria

Had to walk away to recompose myself after that one.

I've driven a Proton Satria at speed - it had to be done, it was my sister's new car

And the car would've done more with no probs (handled well imho) but my sister was screaming at me, clinging on for dear life lol. Surprising amount of speed in that baby (no, NOT my sister!).

e

**M&Ms** · 20-04-2005, 09:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AUII_XLS_Ute

I had a mate in high school who thought the part of a G-String which goes in the back went in the front...

Did they ever try wear it that way

:

Mike Gayner · 20-04-2005, 04:04 PM

My new workmate (who happens to be a dipshit);

"Seen those cool new 50cc scooters?! My mate bought one and took out the resister, now it does 70km/h!"

Walkinshaw · 20-04-2005, 04:07 PM

"Yeah i got oversized valves put in my RX7"

Bluefreak · 27-06-2005, 02:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Walkinshaw

"Yeah i got oversized valves put in my RX7"

I know that bloke... Same one that told me "Mazda hit a winner with those RX7's when they went from the single cam shaft to the DOHC".

M14A-Mclaren · 20-04-2005, 04:24 PM

"My Grandma taught me how to do racing gear shifts"

No shit, someone actually said that to Skinny_Puppy, gave me and him alot of laughs though.

20-04-2005, 04:26 PM

on the topic of what shouldnt be said.....

"is it in yet?"

:

Danny · 20-04-2005, 04:39 PM

****edited by xa-coupe*****
Thats a classy **** first post that.

:

20-04-2005, 05:02 PM

djs are the worst shit talkers ever.

steve strangis is the worst. u should see his website.douchebag

:

santoitaliano · 20-04-2005, 04:24 PM

different person...this maybe isnt bullshit.. but i have a solution..

b/a" "Man it was eatin up clutches, diffs and gearboxes"... me: "but it's stock".. b/a: "yea man must b like a freak from factory"

solution if not bullshit: stick to auto or a pushbike mate! or learn to drive manual..

TheSneakiness · 20-04-2005, 04:35 PM

Here's another one that this particular mate said in High school... (not car related)

"Hong Kong is in China"....

XplosiveR6 · 20-04-2005, 05:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AUII_XLS_Ute

Here's another one that this particular mate said in High school... (not car related)

"Hong Kong is in China"....

lol, hong kong is actually part of china, therefore is in china, same as tasmania is in australia.

MickyB · 20-04-2005, 05:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EF_Dave

lol, hong kong is actually part of china, therefore is in china, same as tasmania is in australia.

Thats what I was about to post. Hmm,

:

A girl who I went to high school with who had some very nice assets once asked me if 'cleavage' was part of a car. WTF!!

jabba · 20-04-2005, 08:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MickyB

A girl who I went to high school with who had some very nice assets once asked me if 'cleavage' was part of a car. WTF!!

That is the best one yet.

bindi · 20-04-2005, 08:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MickyB

Thats what I was about to post. Hmm,

:

A girl who I went to high school with who had some very nice assets once asked me if 'cleavage' was part of a car. WTF!!

A friend of mine told me how her partner lovingly called her "flange"... she thought it was french...

XWGT · 21-04-2005, 05:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bindi

A friend of mine told me how her partner lovingly called her "flange"... she thought it was french...

This has almost made me choke. Gold, pure gold!

Blue Oval Mopar Man · 29-04-2005, 12:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MickyB

Thats what I was about to post. Hmm,

:

A girl who I went to high school with who had some very nice assets once asked me if 'cleavage' was part of a car. WTF!!

Yeah , hey mickey ! I have a 351 cleavage in my XD !

:

GXL078 · 21-11-2006, 09:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AUII_SE_Ute

Here's another one that this particular mate said in High school... (not car related)

"Hong Kong is in China"....

It is NOW.