A Seven Step Guide For When You've Just Woken Up In The Gutter....

[loxxr6]

A Seven Step Guide For When You've Just Woken Up In The Gutter From A
Very Big Night Out...

1. Walk down one of the main streets of the city you happen to be in.

2. Turn left into a side street.

3. Turn left again into an alley. If there is no alley, you are in Hobart, possibly Perth.

4. If drug dealers are milling in the alley, you are probably in Adelaide, Sydney or Brisbane. If you are in Adelaide, buy up, let's face it - if you're not stoned in Adelaide, there's not a lot else to do.

If the drug dealer stabs you, however, you're in Sydney.

5. If you find that when you turned down the side alley you ended back
up on the street you began on, you are in Canberra.

6. If the alley is filled with cool cafes and underground basement dance
clubs that seemingly nobody knows about, you are in Melbourne.

7. If you left the city after turning into a side street, you are in Darwin. Don't worry about looking for the alley, just leave.